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COACHING NEWSLETTER 11/2017
This Month's Topic: Conflict
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Content
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Hello from the Coaching Team
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Dear Students,
This month’s newsletter is about Conflict!
Many people consider conflict as something negative that should be avoided. However, this is not necessarily true. Once you develop an understanding for conflict and appropriate ways to approach it, as Clair Canfield explains it in our Video of the Month, it can strengthen your relationships. In our Article of the Month, you will learn how to lead healthy conflicts in teams, even if you’re shy, by “delivering nicely,” which increases team effectiveness.
We are also happy to present to you our coach, Angela Fischer, who will be happy to help you to achieve your personal goals.
With this newsletter we intend to help all of you be more
successful in your career as well as goal setting. However, the
newsletter is just a very small part compared to what actual
coaching sessions can accomplish. We strongly and heartily
recommend you to make use of our coaching offers. You can choose
from a large number of coaches. To find out more, visit the coaching area on MyEBS to select a coach and book an appointment or
contact us. We’ll be happy to hear from you!
Warm regards,
Your Coaching Team
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Video of the Month: The Beauty of Conflicts
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| For many, conflict is considered a negative experience and an indication that something has gone wrong. When viewed from that perspective it frequently creates interactions that leave us feeling frustrated and unsatisfied. In this talk, Clair identifies some of the ways we get stuck in the trap of justification and also provides hope for a new way of approaching conflict. This different approach unlocks the possibilities of conflict and empowers us to create the change we want in the world around us, in our relationships, places of work, communities, and most of all within ourselves. |
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Conflict Strategies for Nice People - How to Deliver Nicely
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Are you the kind of person that values friendly relations with their fellow students and/or colleagues and would never get into a fight? According to Dr. Liane Davey, a psychologist and author for the Harvard Business Review, it is not necessarily a purely positive thing, as healthy conflicts about certain issues are often necessary in life. Shying away from them can significantly reduce team effectiveness.
There are many people that are not comfortable with conflict. They are afraid that their opinion might hurt someone else’s feeling or disrupt harmonious dynamics within the team. Furthermore, one’s own self-image as a nice person could be at stake. However, the cost of letting one’s perspective be known, challenging faulty assumptions and highlighting hidden risks is, according to Davey, “a very high cost to pay for nice.”
Being a nice person and being able to engage in healthy conflict are not mutually exclusive. Once one understands that it is one’s obligation to bring a different perspective than what others are bringing on the table because, let’s face it, one would be redundant otherwise, the next step is to understand that it is all about the delivery. The way to deliver one’s point across is what can make a conflict sound and look more like a friendly chat among friends while having the same effect.
These five tips could help improve your delivery:
1. Use “and” instead of “but.”
When you disagree with a person, express your opinion as an “and.” The other person does not have to be wrong for you to be right.
Example: “You think we need to improve our presentation for tomorrow and I’m worried we’ll need these few extra hours to finish the Symposium preparations in time. What are our options?”
This way of thinking engages your teammates in problem solving, which is collaborative instead of combative.
2. Use hypotheticals.
Being contradicted directly does not feel good. Asking people to imagine a hypothetical situation can easily cheat their inner guard. Imagining is the opposite of defending, so it gets the brain out of a rut.
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Example: “I hear your concern about getting the right employees for our startup. Assuming we could get the right people, what could our employment ad look like?”
3. Ask about the impact.
Open-ended questions can be very useful, as they feel much less aggressive.
Example: “We are going to release our product-supporting app only for iPhone, thus, only those customers that own one will be able to use it. How is that going to land with our customers that use Android phones?” instead of “Our customers that do not own Android phones will be very angry!”
Showing that you are open to new ideas and curious about the right approach will open up the discussion.
4. Discuss underlying issue.
It is sometimes easier to find another solution by understanding the other person’s reasoning and what is behind the suggestion, as you are not necessarily on the same page.
Example: “I’m surprised you suggested we release information on our product prior to our pitch next week. What is your goal in doing that?”
Conflict arises often when people solve a problem without sufficient thought to the options or the impact of those actions. Understanding the underlying issue can help find an alternative solution.
5. Ask for help.
Another tactic for healthy conflict is partly owning the misunderstanding. If something is really surprising to you, say so.
Example: “I must be missing something. How exactly does it address our lack of empirical evidence?”
If someone’s idea is truly not viable, a series of genuine, open questions that come from a position of helping you understand will likely provide your team with a chance to help steer the plan in a different direction.
Presenting a different point of view even when it is uncomfortable is vital to team effectiveness, as it is diversity of thinking that is the source of innovation and growth. If you find yourself in a situation where you shy away from conflict, use one of these techniques to make it a bit easier. As Davey states it, “the alternative is withholding your concerns, taking them up outside of the team, and slowly eroding trust and credibility. That’s not nice at all.”
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| Original article: https://hbr.org/2013/12/conflict-strategies-for-nice-people/ |
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Coach Introduction: Angela Fischer
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Do you have a dream you’d like to realize? If you’re not one of those people that let their environment decide their fate, Angela Fischer might be the coach who will help you achieve your goals!
Ms. Fischer studied architecture and is currently working as an architect in Munich, Luxembourg and Frankfurt.
She is a get-things-done kind of person who does not like to waste time, is always
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interested in new experiences, is an excellent coach when it comes to making people discover their hidden strengths and abilities, and offers coaching sessions in German and English.
Angela Fischer is married and has two sons. In her free time, she’s socially engaged with children and people in need. She also enjoys photography, sports, traveling and has been to many foreign countries, including Japan, Myanmar and Egypt.
If you feel like you are stuck with your dream, be it founding a company or getting your dream job, she will tell you where to start and how to achieve it. Up for using your time efficiently and reaching your goals? Contact us to book an appointment with Angela Fischer!
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Upcoming Coaching Sessions
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Campus Oestrich-Winkel
02. & 08.12.2017
25. & 26.01.2018
01. & 02.02.2018
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Campus Wiesbaden
22.11.2017
31.01.2018
21.02.2018
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Info
Click
here
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Contact
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Editing
(Responsible according to § 55 I 2 RStV)
Coaching
coaching@ebs.edu |
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Publisher
EBS Universität für Wirtschaft und Recht
Gustav-Stresemann-Ring
3
65189 Wiesbaden
Germany |
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Copyright © EBS Universität für Wirtschaft und Recht, Coaching 2017.
All rights reserved. |
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